As I enter into another year on this earth, a life that isn’t promised to any one of us, growth is all that I can focus on. Running a digital brand centered around looking perfect for so long turned me into a victim of the Three S’s – Social Media, Status and Self Indulgence! I didn’t know it then, but this pattern of worldly living eventually lead to my mental destruction. I got to a place where every day was harder than the next and every blessing that I had was overlooked because I focused on the Three S’s everyday. I would wake up and check my phone, as Kanye says crowd source my self esteem, just to compare myself to the next woman and feel worse. It all came to a head when no matter what, I was miserable. I may have looked good, but the pain I felt inside was almost unbearable.
As I came closer to my 31st birthday, the universe told me that if I wanted to live a free life, free of the world’s pressures, my whole outlook and platform had to change. How can I say that I am positively impacting young women when I am lying to you all on a daily basis?! Living a double life is harder than it seems and not a path that anyone should choose to take. So here I am, freeing myself of the Three S’s and ready to use my platform as a way to talk about life, real life through what I know best; fashion, lifestyle and travel.
I walk with open arms into this year of growth that I want to continue for the rest of the my time here on earth. Once you accept all of you, the good, the bad, and the ugly, you set yourself free. Here I am, laying it all on the table with a focus on positivity through Salvation, Solace and Self Love. I’m replacing the Three S’s with positive antonyms, and you can do this too. This is by no means to say that I don’t struggle on a daily basis, fighting myself as I walk into the unknown and leave behind what we are taught to chase. I’ve outlined a few tips that have helped me as I enter this year of growth, keeping me prepared to fight this uphill battle!
1- Learn to just be you and love each and every inch of you. Your were already made perfect, changing that is telling the Universe that they made a mistake.
2- Get into therapy, it’s has helped me uncover my deepest wounds and learn how to cope with them. We all carry burdens from our past and until we acknowledged and deal with them, freedom is not an option.
3- Figure out what you are here to say, we all have a purpose and despite what we are told, there is enough room for us all to shine. Make sure you are saying something that is truly helpful to the next person, giving is the only way to receive.
4- Forget what the world is saying and listen to your heart. What are you interested in? What makes you jump out of bed in the morning? Whatever it is, do that and do it well.
5- Know that growth takes times, much like addiction, you will relapse. Love yourself during these times and set small goals for yourself as you walk into a blessed life.
6- Happiness is internal, there is nothing external about it. You can look like a million bucks, live in a mansion and still feel like you have nothing, so work on your soul before anything else. Feed your soul!
This wouldn’t be a true Dyandra Raye post without outfit details, however to stay true to my message you can shop this look on another platform here. Remember, the year of growth is for everyone to enjoy, a life of growth is the ultimate goal. Replace the Three S’s with Salvation, Solace, and Self Love and just be you. Thank you 31, freedom here I come!
Special Thanks to Alicia DeLarge and DJ Ferno
Photography by DJ Ferno
Light Makeup by Me (I stripped away everything as I walk this journey in my true form)
